Psychology



Don’t Hate Bad People, Hate the Bad in People

Don’t Hate Bad People, Hate the Bad in People
Published On: 23-Apr-2024
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Article by

Nahin Sani


Doesn't doing bad things make one a bad person? Isn't a person defined by their actions? Then we'd all be bad people, right? After all, we're not perfect. We lie, cheat, make fun of others, backbite, harbor envy, judge others based on appearance, disrespect our family, etc. A lot of these actions could be intentional in order to achieve one's personal desires and they could be simply uncontrolled slips of the tongue, hands or limbs; but they happen so we're exceptions, right? The good people? How do we determine if others are bad or not? More importantly, how do we determine if we're bad people or not?
Does a multitude of bad deeds constitute a bad person, or does one simple shameless act whose knowledge spreads to others like wildfire make up a bad person? In either case, once such deeds of say a criminal are known, their reputation and sometimes their lives are at stake and anything else they had done in their lives is forgotten at that moment. However, if someone is convicted for their crime, who's really put on trial, the person or his evil deeds?
For someone who's done bad deeds but isn't necessarily a criminal, it's hard to tell. One reason is that the people who do wrong could be a part of your family. Your mother could be discriminating against others based on their appearances, your brother could be making lewd comments in public, your sister could be a thief and your father could be a gambling addict. Does that make them bad? Not necessarily.
Your mother could also be a therapist helping the mentally ill patients, your brother could also always be there without hesitation or laziness if anyone in the house needed help in cooking, cleaning, etc., your sister could be a headstrong advocate for human rights and your father could also be spending buck-loads of money in charity and supporting his less well-off family members. You'd know this because you've known them since you were little so you could be stuck in a dilemma.
I believe you can't say people are bad, because 'bad' is the huge umbrella you cover on a person, putting a label on him that he's bad. Once you do that, you shine light upon everything bad but discredit everything honorable that he stood for. His good deeds are worthless because they're clouded by the aura of one simple wrong deed which can be highly unfair. You've compared his righteous side and evil side on the same scale while forgetting that each action, speech and thought of his weighs differently from each other and that they can't all be compared on the same scale.
If that’s so, shouldn't one also be given the label of 'good' in the exact same way? A person having done a multitude of horrendous deeds could do one simple righteous deed that is known to all and he can wear the holy crown of nobility? That doesn't sound practical either because you don't know the value of that one deed as compared to hundreds of others.
Hence, I believe no person is bad and no person is good; only Allah knows what lies in people’s hearts, but some of his deeds are without a doubt good and some are without a doubt bad so when you break down a person into a collection of deeds, you can consider each of them separately and realize it isn't clear as black or white. In order to be a just Muslim and person, you need to judge on the basis of each action. You don't hate the person you hate what a terrible crime he did.

·         You don't hate Firoun, you hate how he wanted a ladder to climb to the sky and talk to Allah, or how he harbored slaves.

·         You don't hate the Quraish, you hate that they persecuted, tortured and murdered innocent Muslims.

·         You don't hate the brothers of Yusuf (A.S), you hate that they stooped to such a low level that they attempted to murder their brother and lied about it to his father. 

·         You don't hate the corrupt politicians of your country, you hate that they suck out the wealth of the nation for their own musings.

·         You don't hate your friend, you hate that she's selfish and rude to her maid.

·         You don't hate your mother, you hate that she shared your secrets in a family gathering.

·         You don't hate your life, you hate that it isn't the way you want it to be.

·         You don't hate yourself; you hate not having done enough in one or two areas of your life.

Apart from the tip of the iceberg, there is an entire being remaining that you don’t know or choose not to know. That entire human being could have an enormous amount of exceptional deeds that you gave no importance to so it's essential that you don’t generalize an entire human on the basis of one deed, but that one deed alone stands firm like a tower and cannot be compensated or nullify another deed. You need to give each deed its due importance. If a saint beats his worker, you need to admonish him for that deed. If a known, manipulative fruit seller made sure your daughter returned home from school safely, his kindness should be commended; who they are otherwise is irrelevant at that moment. Allah knows best and will judge everyone with justice and fairness; I'm simply an imperfect human trying to eradicate the bad in me.

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