Misogynist

Maryam Nawaz, the first woman chief minister of Pakistan's largest province Punjab, took the oath on Friday 23rd of February. Keeping the political field of vision aside, rigging, corruption and all, we as women of Pakistan must see it as a success, where women are still treated as second class citizens. They are mostly even deprived of their basic rights, more appropriately they don’t even know what their basic rights are. A woman becoming chief minister is a victory, going through social media, I realized the hate towards her was coming more from her own gender than the opposite, a complete manifestation of another side of misogyny. I am sure seeing the term ‘Misogynist’, unfortunately the schema is set, and the first idea that comes to mind is “MEN” or something related to them, another story of the patriarchal society and so, but have any of you ever thought that the term is not only associated to men only but amazingly, umm no “Shockingly” in the modern world “The Thriving Era of Radical Feminist” women has turned out to be as misogynist as men. The interesting part is that this bevy does not even have a term to be identified with. Yes! All along we have been so obsessed with linking the term with men, which entirely is not wrong with the sexist mindset the men contain, but that is a debate for another time.

So, coming back to the agenda, women who hate women most of the time may not consciously realize it but their acts reveal them. Now the reasons behind are uncountable, apparent ones could be categorized further; upbringing, family, society etc, and the psychological reason majorly could be the competition either on the basis of beauty or the brains. In fact, some evidence suggests that on Twitter, women use misogynistic language more frequently than men do(themysteriesoflove). 

The prominent female misogynists are described as The Puritan, and The She-Devil.

1- The Puritan Misogynists:  For them the definition of an ideal woman is to be domestic, subservient, nurturing, kind, mild-tempered, alluring, youthful on the other hand the one who is dumb and deaf in the modern world. There is no wrong in possessing any of these qualities, but associating the feminine ideal purely with these qualities is entirely inhumane and to be honest, this definition of “Achi Larki'' in Asian society has played a huge part in caging women and depriving them of their basic rights and achievements, and sadly this definition is coming from the ones’ who share the same gender and are also known as women, and trust me it’s not like this is how these Puritan misogynist have been they too are the victims (though they will never agree to it)  who were deprived of their youth and drained of their energy, to counter that feeling of unfulfillment hating, or bringing back who deviate from the feminine ideal, they take it as their life's mission to find ways to discipline them and ultimately get them on the "right track.", is a catharsis for Puritan Misogynists. Asian movies, dramas, even real life are filled with examples and I am sure dear reader your head already is exploding with images of women around you.

2- The She-Devil Misogynists: The She-Devil is the concept that is usually confused with “Alpha Women” and who would not want to be known as an Alpha. She sees other women as a constant competition consciously and unconsciously and to label them as; manipulative, dishonest, irrational, incompetent or unintelligent, this labeling comes when there is lack of acceptance and to satisfy the coercive thoughts, labeling other women serves as a coping mechanism. She perceives herself as instantiating the stereotypical masculine virtues of intelligence, the strength of character and rationality, and her behavior is manlier. She is in constant competition with other women and would rather kick a woman off the ladder and would not even hesitate to do so. She is host to dark personality traits. Dark traits tend to be subclinical, which means that they are not associated with the level of dysfunction seen in clinical cases.

“Vivienne Parry, a British science journalist and broadcaster, describes her mother as a misogynist of this type. When Parry revealed to her mother that she wanted to study science at the university, her mother responded: “Whatever for?” Parry was taken aback. But it made her wonder: “Why was my mother so against helping anyone of her own gender climb to the same heights as she did? Why was she so loath to laud female achievement—even when the female forging ahead was her own daughter?” When looking at the past through her contemporary lens, the answer to her question turned out to be terrifyingly simple, she writes: “I fear my mother was a misogynist.”’

According to Parry, female misogyny is even more prevalent today than in her mother’s day. Male misogyny runs widespread in today’s society. But, as Parry points out, female misogyny or internalized sexism can be even more toxic. In the hybrid world it seems that everyone is against everyone. In this hybrid world we women need to remind ourselves that

“Each time a woman stands up for herself…without claiming it, she stands up for all women.”

Maya Angelou